The Big Mistake Parents Make When Talking About Sex
When your parents talked to you about sex, it probably didn’t go very well. That’s because 25 years ago, there weren’t many resources to help them. They had to go it alone. They probably stumbled through “the talk” just like your grandparents stumbled through it with them.
In this day and age (when dinosaurs no longer roam the earth), parents who go it alone are making a huge mistake. We should take advantage of some of the great resources out there so that we get it right and our kids will know what they need to know and are prepared for what they will face.
What if talking to your kids about SEX didn't have to be so AWKWARD?
Introducing The Whole Story: your guide to talking to your kids about sex, puberty, and growing up. It’s an amazing resource that we didn’t have with our first four kids but that we are putting to work with kid number five. We could not be more excited about this video-based tool!
If you find talking to your kids about sex, puberty, and relationships to be one of the scariest parts of parenting (and who doesn’t), then this is the perfect resource for you. Our friend Sheila Wray Gregoire has created a series of courses that can help YOU have those conversations with your kids–without it being so scary.
Most parents feel woefully unprepared to talk to their children about sex.
What if I say something wrong?
How do I even get the conversation started?
I just find it really uncomfortable!
And because we feel so scared, too often we make it uncomfortable for our kids! But what if you had HELP starting those important conversations?
What if your GIRLS could hear about the hard stuff from “funny big sisters?” And what if your BOYS had a cool and trustworthy young man who wasn’t afraid to talk about the hard stuff? What if all you had to do was CONTINUE the conversation, when the hard part was already taken care of?
The Whole Story is a video-based course that features trustworthy, Christian young adults teaching your children and young teenagers about everything they need to know about sex, puberty and growing up. And then it has discussion questions, checklists, and parent-child activities so that you can keep that conversation going! You’re still in charge…you’re just getting some help.
The Whole Story is available in different versions for girls and boys and is split into two age groups.
Do you find yourself asking…
WHEN do I tell my kid WHAT? What’s age appropriate?
How do I even start the difficult conversations about puberty or sex–let alone say words like “menstruation” or “penis”?
How can I make sure they know everything they need to?
What do I do when my KID seems embarrassed to talk about things?
Or worst of all….what if my kids realize that their parents are “doing it”?!
The younger version of the course covers all of this!
Or do you find yourself asking…
How can I teach my children the real meaning behind sex?
How can I help them withstand peer pressure and deal with pornography and body image issues?
How can I help my kids have healthy worldviews towards dating and relationships.
And most of all…How do I keep my kid talking to me at all?
The older version of the course covers all of this!
If you’re curious, here’s an overview of the content for each gender and age group…
For Boys Ages 10-13
The younger version teaches your son what to expect when it comes to physical changes, but also addresses social and spiritual development, too. It includes everything your son needs to know about:
How his body is going to change and what he can do to prepare
What sex is and why God designed it the way he did
An introductory conversation about pornography
How to handle crushes and peer pressure in the Jr. High years
Inspiration to grow into a man of godly character
How he can take care of his body to manage all these changes
For Boys Ages 14-16
The older version gets more in-depth and talks about relationships, sex, and character on a deeper level as your son matures. It includes everything your son needs to know about:
Puberty in the teenage and high school years
Navigating relationships with girls in the teenage years.
Discussions about how to handle social issues like when you discover a friend is having sex, bullying, and how to treat girls with respect.
Candid conversation about the highly sexualized world we live in and how to honor God in the midst of that.
Challenges to take charge of where your life is going–questions like “What kind of person am I becoming, and is that the person God made me to be?”
For Girls Ages 10-12
The younger version is information based about the changes her body is going through. It includes everything your daughter needs to know about:
Her period, including why it happens, how to handle it, and how to make it most comfortable.
Other body changes she will be experiencing, including breast development, hair growth, and body odor.
What sex is and how babies are made.
How to handle boys and peer pressure in the preteen years.
How to take care of your body to manage all of these changes.
For Girls Ages 13-16
The older version is more world-view based about the social changes she’s going through. It includes everything your daughter needs to know about:
How to troubleshoot issues with your period that aren’t often talked about.
Navigating relationships with guys in the teenage years.
Discussions about how to handle social issues like when friends make mistakes, bullying, and online peer pressure.
Candid conversation about the highly sexualized world we live in and how to honor God in the midst of that.
Learning the skill of styling yourself to send a message–a message that honors God and shows respect for yourself and others.
Meet the Mentors Behind The Whole Story
The course was developed by Sheila Wray Gregoire, a leading authority on sexuality issues. She coaches marriages and parents at her popular website www.tolovehonorandvacuum.com.
Sheila loves family and marriage, and she’s your guide through talking to your kids about sex, puberty, and everything that comes along with it.
Most of the girls’ videos are led by her 20-something daughters, Rebecca Gregoire Lindenbach and Katie Gregoire Emmerson.
Most of the boys videos are led by Sheldon Neil, a gifted young Christian communicator from Canada. Sheldon is the kind of guy you want your sons to listen to. He’ll be your son’s guide through the course!
What people are saying…
“I took my 10 year old daughter away for the weekend and did all 5 units of the curriculum. I skipped [the sex unit] at first because I wasn’t sure she was ready but then we did the dreaded unit 4 and survived. She hit the pause button right when Rebecca explained [sex] and said “what?! I didn’t know that’s how it happened! I thought God just made you pregnant!” There were some tears but it was great and she thanked me for telling her everything and for the weekend…I know this is just the beginning for us but it’s a good start.”
LM, The Whole Story VIP Facebook Group Member
“We did units 1-4 yesterday. It was a challenging day, with lots of laughs, questions and a few tears as my daughter processed what the pending changes would be like. I’m so grateful for the way the course opens the door for conversation and creates a ‘safe place’ for any question to be asked. We went on a special date to our local board games cafe for dinner to celebrate! Thank you Lord for Sheila, Rebecca & Katie & the gifts You’ve given them & their willingness to serve in this way.”
LD, The Whole Story VIP Facebook Group Member
“We have officially finished the first course!! I feel so encouraged!! Conversation flowed smoothly, and we got through it all really quick because most of it was simply reviewing what we had already talked about!! I can’t believe I was actually already doing this right!! It did fill in a few holes though and hearing things about proper hygiene from Katie and Rebecca that I have been talking about for the last couple if months seems to have finally gotten through to her!! Thank you so much for this resource!! We are excited to work through the second course in a year or so!!”
CL. The Whole Story VIP Facebook Group Member
The courses are arranged so that, for the younger kids, it’s more information based. They tell them what is happening and why, but they leave the emotional parts until the older version. That’s when they delve into those hard topics that affect teenagers.
The creators found that so many kids today hit puberty when they’re still really young and before sexual feelings really start. Yet often that’s the last time parents talk to their children–when they hit puberty.
And then, when they really need help, we’ve forgotten how to have those conversations. With The Whole Story, you can keep having those important talks!
But we don’t aim to replace you. This is just a resource to START those conversations.
These young “mentors” in the videos are not raising your children! It’s YOUR values that matter. Their goal is to start the conversations at just the right ages, and then allow YOU to guide those conversations home.
Want Some More Specific Information?
Here’s what’s in The Whole Story (For Girls):
Younger Version (ages 10-12)
Unit 1: What is your period? And how do you handle it?
Unit 2: How Your Body is Changing: What to expect (Including acne, breast development, hair growth, and more).
Unit 3: Boys & Friends: Handling crushes, bullying, and peer pressure.
Unit 4: The Sex Talk: How babies are made and what is sex, anyway?
Unit 5: Taking Care of Your Body: How to take care of yourself now that you’re becoming a young woman.
Older Version (ages 13-15):
Unit 1: Troubleshooting Your Period: When is something wrong, dealing with PMS, and methods to manage your period.
Unit 2: Puberty 2.0: Developing a Woman’s Body & What Boys are Going Through
Unit 3: Relationships in the Teenage Years: Navigating dating, friendships, and peer pressure without sacrificing your values.
Unit 4: God’s Design for Sex: Why God made sex the way he did and how to live in our highly sexualized culture in a way that pleases Him.
Unit 5: Becoming a Woman: How to dress classy and respectful and how to stay healthy in the teenage years.
The VIP Version for Girls includes both of the courses as well as extra materials such as:
Podcasts on teaching younger kids about sex
A Doctor speaks about how to know when you need to see a physician
Extra mother-daughter activity ideas
Parenting webinar and much more.
Here’s what’s in The Whole Story (For Boys):
Younger Version (ages 10-13)
Unit 1: What is sex, and why did God make it the way He did?
Unit 2: How Your Body is Changing: What to expect and how to prepare for it.
Unit 3: Girls & Friends: Handling crushes, bullying, and peer pressure.
Unit 4: Becoming a Man of God: treating others well and becoming a man of good character.
Unit 5: Taking Care of Your Body: How to take care of yourself now that you’re becoming a young man.
Older Version (ages 14-16):
Unit 1: Puberty in the teenage years: what to expect through high school.
Unit 2: Social Changes and Issues: Wrestling with party culture, dating, bullying, and more.
Unit 3: The Sex Talk: why God made sex the way he did and why it’s meant for marriage as well as real talk about porn and masturbation.
Unit 4: Becoming a Man of God: learning where to put your identity and become the person you were designed to be.
Unit 5: Taking Care of Yourself: Staying healthy and developing good hygiene habits.
The VIP Version for Boys includes both of the courses as well as extra materials such as:
Podcasts on teaching younger kids about sex
Three (3) bonus units including one on video game addiction.
Parenting webinars and much more.